A Christian Friend to Walk With You

by Heather Smith, Pastoral Care Coordinator

It was so nice to have the opportunity to share my feelings about a personally stressful situation with a trained listener. I had lost sleep, was abrupt with my husband and daughter, and was feeling alienated from my neighbors. The worst part of the whole thing, was that this issue wasn’t really a crisis at all, just a normal life stressor. But I had lost sight of the bigger picture and was feeling hurt.

I was walking out of my Stephen Ministry supervision meeting feeling a bit better, when one of my fellow Stephen Ministers pulled me aside and asked me how I was feeling. She simply listened. She heard my anger, resentment, and pain, and simply listened. She gently reflected back these feelings and reminded me that God was still there. She didn’t offer guidance, answers, or opinions. Truly, she just listened. And, I slept well that night. Oh, I was still angry the next morning and still had a sense of hurt about the whole thing. But, I saw a glimmer of hope that this situation would work itself out and that I could move through my feelings.  And at that time, that was what I really needed.

I experienced first hand the power of Stephen Ministry. Stephen Ministers are caring and formally trained lay people who provide faith-based support for others who are experiencing difficult circumstances. They commit themselves to confidentiality, disclosing no identifying information about anyone receiving their support. They do not attempt to take the place of clergy, counselors, or mental health and medical professionals. Rather, they supplement professional care by offering compassion, Christian companionship and spiritual support. They meet regularly with their peer supervision group, stay connected to Jesus, and trust that he will stay connected to them in their care-giving relationship.

We are very blessed to have a full team of commissioned Stephen Ministers at St. Thomas. During difficult times of transition or stress, Stephen Ministers can be especially helpful to those who are experiencing a job crisis, birth or adoption, parenting issues, serious illness, relocation, grief from a death or serious loss, aging and end of life issues, long term disability, separation or divorce, or a spiritual crisis. And as I learned from my own experience, they can be especially helpful for the common non-crisis “rough patches” everyone encounters in life.

You can support this Ministry program at St. Thomas by praying for both Stephen Ministers and Leaders as they provide Christian care to others. Pray for all who are receiving confidential care. Tell other parishioners that Stephen Ministers are available to assist in times of trouble and encourage others in the parish to notify the clergy of their need for a Stephen Minister. Ask for a Stephen Minister when you are in need of support. Consider becoming a Stephen Minister yourself.